Coverage

YEXTRAAA YINNINGS 

(Jab thak Samose Mein Rahega Alu, Extraa Innings Ko Host Karenge Mandira aur Charu)

YExtraaa Yinnings is back on air…awwww!! , But now with a new bimbette.  As Ruby Bhatia was dropped from the SET MAX list, it was easy for the producer to find an equally dumb presenter.  He must have been to the sets of KSBKBT, and discovered how Mandira Bedi could be useful in hosting their cricket show.  But do u think that the things have changed?? Nopes…even if Yana hosts the show, it can’t …so expect the same bad-bad and mach-mach that these people talk on the show! In this episode of Extraaa Innings, Venkat brings out the best outta this dumb crew!

An Episode of Extraaa Innings: - (Hum ko Tho hai Poora Yakeen…Hum Jaisa Dumb Koi Nahin)

"Aap sab darshankon ka swagath hai Extraaa Innings mein is seedhe prasaran mein sirf Sony MAX par from Cape Town". (Mandira has ratified this sentence and spits it out after every commercial break only difference  ‘Firse ek baar’ in between ka and swagath….. Juss gimme a break).  Mandira Bedi….oooh aaah oooh la la!! … ( This is what Charu thinks of her….eeee kya ghaati choice hai). Yeh to bas suruvaat hai, aage dekhiyega (sirf break ke baad)…

Again Mandira vomits her by hearted sentence … and next, we start our features… 1^st of them called “its on the cards”… Here some dumb Maa Prem Rutumbara (someone like Sri Sri … hehe) uses her knowledge of tarot cards to predict the match (yeh kya ho raha hai?). A so called Maa not in a position to predict her own dawn future picks up cards like a road side parrot astrologer and interprets some crap the card says.  Charu picks the card from his left hand, and Mandira seeks astrological answers to her dumb questions like “Will the lefties play well?” and the ‘Maa’ replies, “In this card, the soldier holds the sword on his left hand, and certainly I feel they will succeed”… (Isn’t that height of dumbness)? The cry of the break (Sponsors First) finally is heard and Mandira does the needful!! (Oye … ek to bahut pakau hai, saala is sey accha to Kahani Teri Meri tha).

 

Commercial Break – Pepsi ( There’s one more problem besides the Sher…the programme to follow), Coke (Thanda ka Thadka laga diya rey, Mandira ko kyon nahi lagaya??), Samsung (Hum mein hai ghum, hum hai, team SET MAX).

"Welcome to Extraaa Innings live and exclusive from South Africa only on Sony Max". The time has come to catch up with the Indian team on tour for all u Indian viewers. Our roaming cameramen will catch up all the action they are up to on India on Tour… (Abbey zara ek minute bhi nahi milega kya ….covering live from the Indian dressing room ka loo)…Nothing gets worse than this…isn’t it? When Saurav talks to Dona, the cam is behind him, when Mr.Unknown (bookie) talks to someone, there is no cam (how unfortunate na). Fir baadme kya hota hai, Ram Jaane? Again, the break ka aawaz comes from Mandira, and again the crap begins, but they leave with something called “The Voices of India” where, the pessimistic public of India, even thinks they will lose against Holland (which they almost did)…(Aakhir me Public Hai, Sub Jaanti Hai).

 

Commercial Break – Bagpiper (Rang jamega jab mil baithenge teen yaar, Charu, Mandira aur Viewers…hehe), Characters from the ‘K’ serials appear and say “Go Mandira Go”, a reminder about the dildaar mukabla “ Australia vs Holland” (is it really  a dildaar mukabla?).

Do I need to repeat something? Charu forgets and Mandira interrupts in between and starts her bakwaas. Apart from their ongoing discussions, the next feature begins…Stumped (a great feature, if you are a Maria fan). Let’s catch up with whom and what Maria is doing…she’s now pakaofying Chris Harris.

That’s it …some adha teda questions and the feature is over! One must really pity the player, aakhir woh bhi to insaan hai.  This is something we are not used to, especially the players, who aren’t usually questioned by bimbettes.  She gets back to Mandira, who does this best than anyone else – Acts like an answering machine and gets the break going.

Welcome Back…without wasting any more time, we move onto the next feature, a mythological look of the match (Mahabharata in South Africa is like the World Cup in Kurukshetra). "Mai Samay Hoon" (teri ghadi ruk gayee kya?) a voice commonly heard, appears once again.  But in this version of Mahabharata, there are war of words between Dhritarashtra (ancient day Charu Sharma) and Shakuni (ancient day bookie) about the teams that play. They call the trump cards “Shikhandi” and the other 10 players as Pandavas (isn’t that strange…Pandav kitne they?? PAANCH)…A controversial feature (esp. if ur a VHP fan …rise up dude) which has the so-called munis using words like West Indies and Nayi Zealand (wah! kya baat hai…kya bhasha hai!!)…something Krishna and Arjuna will be thinking over in the Divine Indralok.  The time for break has come…and we will be right back..kidhar bhi jaayiga mat! (my advice is please go!)

 

Commercial Break – Hero Honda Splendour (Hum Hai…Sabse Aage…SET MAX for one can’t claim that), Fair and Lovely (Charu ki kundli badal gayee…Mandira mil gayee na),  Reliance Mobile (Ek Soch Thee, Ek Sapna Tha to stop watching Extraaa Innings).

Aap ka firse swagat hai, Extraaa Innings ke seedhe prasaran mein sirf Cape Town, South Africa se (oye, yeh tu kitne baar bolegi…moo dukhta nahi hai kya?). For all those who have a mobile phone, we’ve got an SMS based game for you called Predikta. Yeh aap aapke mobile phone se khel sakte hai. (how many languages will u tell this out?). There are 3 types of Predikata…Jackpot, Insta, and Krazee.  All three have questions which one shouldn’t take them lightly (coz there is a winner everyday from Bangalore, Charu’s hometown)…but the quality of these questions will make u run up and down…Predikta Insta (How many bowlers will bowl out their 10 overs, during India’s batting) – actually one did … (the options were 2,3,4,5) – jhatka lag gayee na … Predikta Krazee (How many players will have their surnames beginning from vowels?) – as good as counting chickens in  a poultry farm…Predikta Jackpot (How many runs will be scored in the first over of the Windies Vs New Zealand Match) – Hai Koi Jawaab? (arrey yeh game khelna chodiye…coz 99% of the times, ur cell says ‘Message Not Sent This Time’). So better we not waste our time and money…coz both are equally precious (for us) if not for those dumbos.  Time for another break on Extraaa Innings, but we will be right back…

 

Commercial Break – Clinic All Clear (Get out…Get Going – the best message for Charu and Mandira), Pepsodent (Confidence with Insurance – something u need to have while watching Extraaa Innings).

Aap ka fir swagat hai Extraaa Innings mein…Hum break ke pehley Predikta ke bare mein baat kar rahe they…abhi hum aapke favourite cricketers ke manpasand khana kya hai dekhtey hey !! Our Next Feature…Today we have a very special dish made for Sachin Tendulkar…called Vada Pav..Something which you don’t get it Tendulkars – sad naa…tumhala mee Vada Pav shijavnyasathi shikavto…(arrey tu thoda khana pakaney ko band karega kya? already dimaag ka dahi ho gayela hai)…After he takes the Vada from the pan, he puts in the Pav and takes a bite, and talks about his own cakes.

That’s it…That’s Enough…and That’s all. Let’s catch up all the action (it took them so much time, to realize that they were playing an innings of pakau nonsense, kiddish approach towards cricket and taking the cricket element out of the show). This was just a spoof!! but these things do happen…At the end of it, thou art the viewer and such spoofs shouldn’t influence you, if u think Extraaa Innings is the show  for you…do watch it…But as for Me, I feel ESPN Star’s Taking Guard my just seem better…

::Om Cricketaya Namaha::

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